Autumn Ending Fast...

Eventually, all of the pieces will fall into place. Until then, laugh at the confusion, live for the moment, and know that everything happens for a reason. I've been living by this quote the past several months. I feel like summer just ended yesterday. How is it that the summer seemed to have lasted FOREVER and Fall feels like it just started and is now over? I'm definitely feeling more at ease these days. After a hectic/chaotic summer I needed a break. I had to stop and breathe. I had to take some time to catch my breath. That is exactly what I have been doing. So far, so good. Still waiting for those pieces to fall into place, but I'm definitely in no hurry at all.

I've been living in the moment and trying my best to enjoy each day as it comes to me. I've been very busy this fall, traveling a lot. Seeing my friends and keeping out of trouble for sure. Working hard and trying to refocus and get organized. I'm getting a new roommate and couldn't be more excited. I'm hoping to pay off lots of debt and begin to save money for my next adventure. What exactly is that next adventure? Who knows. So many options, so many choices. All that can be decided when the time is right.

Every ending has a new beginning

As we come to an end of this summer I am both excited and sad at the same time. I went through a roller coaster of emotions, but at the same time had the time of my life. Breaking up with my boyfriend was one of the best things I did for myself. Not only did it open up many, many doors, but it let me have one of the best summers of my life. You really never know where life will take you. The people you meet can change your life in an instant. I met some amazing people this summer and reconnected with some amazing old friends as well. It's funny how you get into a relationship and the rest of the world seems to just fade away in that moment of time. I hope that in my next relationship this doesn't happen.

I am definitely exhausted. This summer has wore me down both physically and emotionally. I don't think I have stopped since it started. Every time I tell myself that I want to stop and slow down for a bit I find something else to do. For now I think that is okay. I can slow down when I'm ready. I'm slowly getting excited for our trip to Spain. I have been way too busy to even realize that it is just around the corner. I guess that is what happens when you are having fun with life. You aren't constantly waiting around for something big to happen. You are making something big happen as you go.

Some fun things that I will miss about this summer: Boating on the lake, camping trips, spontaneous shopping trips with the girls, girls nights (that will continue beyond summer), Adirondack extreme, summer concerts (wish I went to more!), Being in the sun, swimming, Eric's hockey game (definitely will continue), My amazing summer party, The track and Saratoga, being with really good friends.

So as this summer comes to an end. I am very excited to see where fall will take me. My life these days feels very unplanned and for the first time, I'm okay with that. You really never do know where life will take you. Stop planning and live your life. It is my firm believing that life is all up to fate and that everything really does happen for a reason. I think that no matter what things will turn out okay. That my life will be amazing and I'm excited to see where it will take me. It's funny how only three years ago I thought I had everything laid out. I thought I knew exactly where I wanted to go and what I wanted to do. Now I have absolutely no idea and that is the best feeling in the world. I have every opportunity put in front of me and nothing holding me back from taking advantage of any of them.

A New Chapter

I never blog anymore. I got really into it for a while and I think I stopped because I was bored and running out of things to say, plus I don't think anyone was really reading it. I don't care either way...

I am beginning a new chapter in my life. I feel like I have come to a point in my life where I really need to stop and refocus everything I've ever thought. Well, maybe not completely but for the most part. I am in the process of an entirely new self discovery and trying to change in new ways and for the better. I am trying to experience life in a more positive way and really find out what I want to get out of life. I want to find my purpose and meaning to the world.

I recently broke up with my boyfriend, a decision that came about over too many issues to fully explain. The main reason I think is because when I got out of college I felt like I was on a path. A path to live the everyday life that people are "supposed" to live. I had to get a job, find someone to marry, and have kids, then live happily ever after. I wanted all of this until I had it. I then began to feel like I couldn't breathe. Like every single part of me was being stripped away. I didn't know who I was and I didn't know how to find myself. I felt trapped. Trapped in a life that I didn't know if I wanted.

The good thing about this new chapter I am about to enter is that I still don't know what I want out of life. I still don't know who I am or who I want to be. The difference now is that I have an entire world of possibilies placed before me. I can do anything in the world that I want to do and no one will ever hold me back... I think that is the best feeling in the world.