Saturday, September 18, 2010

Summer in the City

Life changes. I strived to get them and here I am. Happy? I guess you could say I'm not "unhappy". Since I made the decision to change my life and move to NYC it has been a constant struggle to adjust to this new life. I spent my summer in Manhattan and definitely enjoyed it while I was there, but I'm just not sure I was there long enough to get the full "experience" I wanted to get. Living in Long Island is not exactly what I call ideal. But living with my boyfriend helps to make the situation much more enjoyable. The only issue I struggle with now, is finding a balance between my own life and my life with him. I moved in here before I was settled into my new life and I now struggle to find myself in this city while trying to live a life with him. I never got the chance to really find my own place here. I missed out on the opportunity to explore and challenge myself to new adventures. I can't say I regret anything, its more about learning to make myself happy first without having to rely on someone else for happiness.

At the end of the day with all of the struggles I face with a new job, new friends, new environment. I know that I ultimately made the right decision. I left because I NEEDED a change. I needed something challenging and different in order to experience life. I needed to have this so that I could one day wake up and KNOW that I took a chance even though I was scared and made things happen when I wasn't sure that I could. At the end of the day I know that my life here will be okay. It's going to take time and its going to take adjustments, but just like I always do, I'll make things work here.