I never blog anymore.  I got really into it for a while and I think I stopped because I was bored and running out of things to say, plus I don't think anyone was really reading it.  I don't care either way...
I am beginning a new chapter in my life.  I feel like I have come to a point in my life where I really need to stop and refocus everything I've ever thought.  Well, maybe not completely but for the most part.  I am in the process of an entirely new self discovery and trying to change in new ways and for the better.  I am trying to experience life in a more positive way and really find out what I want to get out of life.  I want to find my purpose and meaning to the world.
I recently broke up with my boyfriend, a decision that came about over too many issues to fully explain.  The main reason I think is because when I got out of college I felt like I was on a path.  A path to live the everyday life that people are "supposed" to live.  I had to get a job, find someone to marry, and have kids, then live happily ever after.  I wanted all of this until I had it.  I then began to feel like I couldn't breathe.  Like every single part of me was being stripped away.  I didn't know who I was and I didn't know how to find myself.  I felt trapped.  Trapped in a life that I didn't know if I wanted. 
The good thing about this new chapter I am about to enter is that I still don't know what I want out of life.  I still don't know who I am or who I want to be.  The difference now is that I have an entire world of possibilies placed before me.  I can do anything in the world that I want to do and no one will ever hold me back...  I think that is the best feeling in the world.
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
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